Project insight
The SPO Voice project started when I had my epiphany regarding not being alone in my SPO career challenges.
It's then that I reached out to Jess Sands of Milspo, and volunteered as their Head of Communications. My bug to help other SPOs in their careers was well and truly caught; I wanted to work and help SPOs such as those who are members of Milspo.
Inspired, I began digging around to see what was also out there to help SPOs. The first port of call was the Living in our Shoes Report ...
Living in our Shoes
So, here's a little bit about this extensive report ... In January 2019, the then Defence Secretary, The Rt Hon Gavin Williamson CBE MP, commissioned Andrew Selous MP to conduct an independent review to consider the diverse needs of Service families, assess whether the current support offer is meeting these needs, and make recommendations accordingly. The focus of this review was on currently Serving personnel, including those preparing to leave the Armed Forces, and their families.
Key themes emerged during the review about the challenges experienced by military families today which are regarded as detrimental to modern family life and relationships. These refer to: Service Family Accommodation (SFA); mobility; deployment; the impact of Service life on military children and young people; the employment and careers of spouses/partners; the health and well-being of Serving personnel and family members; and the impact of Service life on personal relationships.

"The impact of Service life on family and personal life remains the top factor influencing decisions about whether to leave the military."
Living in our Shoes: Report of a review commissioned by the Ministry of Defence | June 2020
The parts of the report that naturally fascinated me are as follows ...
The Facts:
'Abundant Research Evidence shows that:
'Military families have to: understand that ‘duty’ comes first, and operational effectiveness is the main priority; manage sometimes lengthy periods spent apart as a result of deployments; undertake frequent moves and relocations which entail disruptions in children’s education, health care and spousal/partner employment; and cope with tensions in balancing family life with the demands of Service life.
'It is increasingly expected and financially necessary that both partners in military and civilian families will be in paid employment. Balancing paid employment with bringing up children and navigating a military lifestyle nevertheless presents a number of additional challenges for the non-serving partner. Partners and spouses acknowledge that Serving members of the military expect to be moved around and to be away from home for lengthy periods, and that these requirements will have an impact on whether and how the non-serving partner chooses to work*.'
[Taking into consideration for the SPO Voice project, how the majority of SPOs have children, the importance of having a happy, fulfilled, confident SPO really hits home when you consider how a lack of this further affects military children who already have the following risks - as outlined in the report]:
- children thrive best in stable, loving households and parental separation and divorce increase the risk factors contributing to poor outcomes for children and young people
- continued conflict between parents has detrimental impacts on children
- there is a clear correlation between relationship breakdown and adult ill-health, including mental health and mortality, and children are also more likely to experience negative health outcomes
- repeated family disruptions increase children’s vulnerability.
- Family breakdown presents a series of challenges for all families but these are increased for military families, especially if they have been living in Defence accommodation.'
'Studies suggest that military partners experience difficulties in securing employment primarily due to:
- the impacts of separation and deployment
- frequent relocation and high mobility
- the challenges associated with keeping up with professional development
- the lack of (re)training opportunities
- having to change career path
- general military culture.'
'[The] review shows that non-serving partners are often restricted in the choice of employment and frequently take jobs that do not make use of their education and/or academic qualifications or technical skills:
“I will put my hand to any work going but I have been to places that even working on checkouts they wouldn’t employ me because I was overqualified.”
(RAF non-serving partner)
"A military model based on a notion of a working father and a stay-at-home mother looking after her husband and her children, willing to go anywhere the Armed Forces require, whenever they require it, is no longer realistic."
Living in our Shoes: Report of a review commissioned by the Ministry of Defence | June 2020
* "Partners and spouses acknowledge that Serving members of the military expect to be moved around and to be away from home for lengthy periods, and that these requirements will have an impact on whether and how the non-serving partner chooses to work."
Living in our Shoes: Report of a review commissioned by the Ministry of Defence | June 2020
[* However, is there really a choice?]
The Impact:
'Non-Serving partners often feel that they have to make a choice between being with the Serving partner or having a stable base and pursuing their career, but that they can never have both. They frequently argue for longer assignments and fewer moves:
“Partner employment has always had an impact on my family. With the constant moving around my wife cannot really settle down into a decent job, and even if she can get a job, then by the time she has built up her experience we move again and she has to start from scratch again and again.”
(Army Serving partner)
'Decisions relating to childcare, preserving the relationship with the Serving partner and whether and how to obtain employment are hugely important decisions and they often involve significant compromises. The difficulties faced by partners in securing a satisfying and worthwhile career while moving frequently are clearly drivers in Serving partners’ decisions to leave the military.
'The loss of confidence and self-esteem and the loss in earnings reported by some partners had a negative impact on their relationship with their Serving partner, resulting in high levels of stress within the family:
“The impact this has had on me, my relationship with my husband, my relationship with friends and family and the toll on my mental health has been devastating. Lack of employment opportunities for me will be the reason my husband leaves the Army. We have regularly lived on one income and I am at the very bottom of the employment ladder...it is thoroughly depressing and demoralising.”
(Army non-serving partner)
'Creating new employment opportunities for non-serving partners:
'Recognition of the importance of spousal and partner employment has begun to take account of the wider benefits of supporting partners to be able to build careers which can fit with the military life style and the obligations on Serving personnel to put duty first.
'Employment provides partners with a sense of purpose which is very important during long periods when their Serving partner is away from home. So while the challenges of working are greater for Service spouses and partners during periods of deployment and training, the benefits of having one’s own employment are considerable.
'The ability to develop professional and social networks through employment is even more significant for Service partners when families decide to move away from the patch and live in non-military communities. Not being defined by their Armed Forces connection allows the family, and especially the non-military partner, to integrate with the wider community and cope with the emotional challenges of loneliness.'
"Developing a more holistic approach
"Planning in the military must take account of the whole family and not simply prioritise the Serving person when decisions taken have considerable implications for spouses/partners and their children. Given the changing expectations of military spouses and partners, support for the wellbeing of non-serving partners should extend to taking measures to protect and enhance their employability."
Living in our Shoes: Report of a review commissioned by the Ministry of Defence | June 2020